Guide to UKP review writing
This essay contains the advice or opinions of one or more UKPunting members. Essays are not UK Punting policies.
- 1 A short summary of this page
- 2 Introduction
- 3 General guidelines and common mistakes to be avoided
- 4 Technical/IT stuff
- 5 Examples of rating systems
- 6 Threads on this topic
- 7 See also
A short summary of this page
Include in your review (LLL&S):
* Profile name plus LOCATION in the SUBJECT.
* AW profile link or contact details at the start of the review.
* Logistics: booking and communication.
* Location (for In-call): Safety, discretion, facilities, comfort, ease of finding.
* Looks: WG body and face, approximate age, height and dress size, hygiene, outfit, accuracy of photos, nationality and language.
* Services used and the price paid (detailing time and extras charged). Mention enthusiasm, attitude, time keeping.
* Bonus points: Current photos from the profile.
There are few rules about how to write a review other than those against touting and fake reviews. Following the guidance below will make your reviews more helpful for the reader. You can adopt a style/format from the existing reviews section or you can develop your own. Note that a minimum content is required. Reviews without enough description to justify the rating usually get turned into a discussion thread.
General guidelines and common mistakes to be avoided
The overall rule is 'Your review, your rating.'
The choice over when to give a Positive/Neutral/Negative rating is contentious. As a rule of thumb ask yourself whether you would still choose to go through exactly the same punt if you had the opportunity again. If you would not then you should probably give a negative. If you would repeat the punt, and depending on the negatives (if any), you should either give a positive or a neutral rating. A further test is whether you will return in the future. If you would not return then you should give either a neutral or negative rating. If you do not generally see WG's more than once remember that this is a mental test. There is a range of opinion about how you should treat dishonesty, misrepresented services, fake pictures and poor value in terms of the overall rating. In these instances, pointing out how you arrived at your recommendation will at least leave the reader better informed about whether they want to visit.
- The two essential elements to include in the subject of your review are (i) the WG's name, and (ii) the location. When possible, cut and paste the name from their profile into the title of your review. For location, use the closest rail or underground station for London. In the rest of the country include the nearest town. If agency, include the agency as a third item. Also, indicate in the subject field if your review is of a transsexual using the acronym TS.
- Include contact details for the WG, in the form of the full reference code that you will find at the bottom of her Adultwork profile. Readers find it helpful if you put this at the top. Including the AW link creates an automatic link to previous reviews and includes your review in the total. Where a WG does not have an Adultwork page, give whatever contact details she publishes in order to allow others to book.
- Include a list of the services you used, particularly if they were unusual. Certain services - DFK, A'levels, swallow etc - can be difficult to obtain so say if these are available. Indicate if extras were charged for any particular service and highlight if this is not advertised in the profile.
- Do NOT give an address or sufficient information to allow a casual reader of the board to identify where the WG is based. Doing so puts both the WG and other punters at risk of physical harm and legal involvement. It can be helpful to indicate the approximate distance from the nearest station as well as the availability and cost of parking. Naming hotels is allowed under forum rules, but in practice can be counter-productive. Even if the manager of the hotel knows that his rooms are being used for prostitution, his head office may not want this type of publicity, and force him to tighten up security by, for example, introducing keycards for lifts.
- Please upload one (or more) images from the WG's profile to your review. There are easy-to-use facilities on UK Punting to help you do this. In addition mention whether they are a recent and accurate impression of the WG. This is particularly the case for any clear face pictures in the profile, either in the galleries or in the verification photo. WG's may change profile pictures (and profiles); including images makes it much easier to identify when a profile changes hands.
- Where to post? Post in the regional forum where the punt took place. Which region is XXX town in? UK Punting uses the regions as per here Regions
- Make your review accessible. It is good practice to use titles/sub-headings. One continuous paragraph will risk boring people. Remember that many members are using their mobile phones to read reviews. If you write a long review, then a good summary highlighting the positive, neutral and negative points can be very helpful for them as they may wish to skip the detailed descriptions.
- It can be very helpful to comment about the pre-punt communication e.g. what you know about the best way to communicate with the WG, discussing/confirming services and how the booking was made. Knowing that a WG (i) only responds to phone calls, (ii) does not use the green light availability system, (iii) cannot read English, (iv) does not switch her phone on until four in the afternoon but (v) is reliable when a booking a week in advance and (vi) will honour email service requests sent ahead of time, can be very useful information and make it less time consuming to make an arrangement. Similarly, additional information about a WG's availability to take bookings and for appointments can be very helpful. Be careful to state your experience, rather than repeating things from her profile that you cannot confirm.
- Try to give a reasonably detailed and objective description of her looks toward the beginning of the review. While a certain degree of subjectivity is inevitable, it can be helpful to mention both particularly attractive or unattractive physical features. If you can, indicate the WG's approximate height, dress size and any distinctive identifying characteristics (which make it much easier for other punters to determine whether they are actually meeting the same girl). If you can find a reminiscent public figure it can help other punters decide whether she is their "type." The use of rating scales for physical and facial attractiveness is contentious - one method developed by Jason is detailed below. Highlight any concerns about hygiene. Give your view of her actual age.
- Write your review keeping in mind your audience. Answer the questions that you might want answered about a girl that you are interested to meet for first time: (i) whether her pictures are authentic and accurate, (ii) her attitude during the meeting, (iii) whether her place is safe, discreet, clean etc, (iv) whether she clock-watches, (v) whether she is rushes, (vi) whether she provides all the listed services or she tries to avoid some, (vii) whether she will meet a dress request, and (viii) whether she will meet an unusual service request.
- Aim for balance and include aspects that could deter or attract other punters. You may downplay them if they did not bother you but you should mention them. For example, you may not prefer OWO so if it is not offered you do not see it as a negative but for others this could deter them from booking. Similarly, not offering kissing, french kissing or deep french kissing, not allowing "fingers", or only providing covered service may be decisive for other punters. Likewise, appearance (having tattoos, piercings, saggy tits, fake tits, full waist, stretch-marks, fat arse, etc particularly where it is not obvious in the profile photographs), being smoker, and speaking only very basic English are all worth mentioning.
- You are free to post your own positive review for your own experience. Do not reference other reviewers reviews to defend your position or post a review to white knight an escort.(example)
- Mention her actual price and her actual looks and her actual service. If you just say 'price and service as her profile' this is not helpful when the profile changes.
- Be concise. Posting detailed descriptions is perfectly fine as long as they are related to the punt itself. Read your review before posting it.
- It can be helpful to point out areas of distinctive or outstanding service from a WG for readers whose tastes may be similar to your own. Particularly point out "nice surprises".
- Write a review in order to allow other punters to make an informed choice about whether they want to visit the WG, rather than in order to “promote” the girl because you think “she deserves it”. This is the most common mistake and there is nothing worse than a punter who assumes the role of a prostitute’s forum pimp.
- Your review should be factual. 'I found her attractive' is factual. 'She is the best looking girl in Birmingham' is not. Remember you can be as fluffy as you wish DURING the meeting but do not come across as delusional no matter how good the GFE illusion provided by the WG had been.
- Avoid writing a review about YOU, rather than the WG. Do not boast about yourself in a review (your 7 or 10 inches cock, your Cristiano Ronaldo looks, your fit body, that the prossie told you that you’re handsome, your luxurious car, your wealth, your martial arts and cage-fighting skills, etc.) Even if what you are saying is real, you will likely be ridiculed as a fantasist plus there is no reason to mention such things in a review.
- Avoid hyperbole; use superlatives selectively. It will help readers if you apply objectivity. If you review multiple girls, others may see a pattern and see whether they can relate to your taste, etc. So it is important to be consistent. If, for example, you are using some sort of rating system then whatever the numerical scale you use, make sure the scores you award to different girls are such that the difference in the values somehow reflect the difference between the reviewed girls for that specific attribute (e.g. looks). Giving everyone 10/10 or the same score unless truly great or really equal defeats the purpose of having a scale.
- Do not blame other reviewers for misleading you about a punt due to their previous positive feedback about the girl. If you have reason to believe that the feedback they had given was fake, this is best discussed on their review. Have the following analogy in mind: Visiting an escort is like being a tourist visiting a certain place - a review is like taking one picture of the location. The usefulness of that picture (to others who consider visiting the same place) depends on the quality of the picture but, even with the most helpful angle, and a good camera, it is still one picture taken at a particular date and time. If between the moment the picture was taken and your visit the place was struck by an earthquake, typhoon or tsunami and the only things you get to see are ruins it is not the fault of the previous reviewers. Many escorts have both positive and negative reviews - it does not mean one is right and one is wrong. If you are seeking guarantees in punting, then punting is not for you.
- While there is not full agreement, many UKP members do not like reviews that are recommendations at all. You can write a Positive review without the mindset of recommending. You are simply stating what happened to you. It could be the most positive punt you have ever had, but the neutral mindset (without the word 'recommend') may help you write a good review.
- Do not put links to other escorts in the review (unless it is a duo). That is because these may be captured as the other girl's rating. It is better to mention the name, then reply to your own review and add in the link.
- Timeframe. How old can a review be? There is no rule on time, use your judgement on whether it helps the punter, and mention the time frame in your comments. See discussion and comment
- Photos. Now that there is an easy to use photo feature, it is great practice to capture a picture and perhaps an AW profile screen shot. This aids it tracking escorts who change profiles .Could be from public or private galleries - particularly face photos and whole body photos),
- Many members like to end with a summary of positives and negatives.
Things NOT to Say
- What happened next is private. Say what you want to say, and leave out what you need to leave out to protect your privacy. If you can't write in simple terms what happened, then don't write a review.
- She is a real gem and I want to keep her for myself. There is nothing factual here.
- Treat her with respect. As if the readers were going to treat her poorly but since you wrote this, now they wont? Please provide facts, not instructions.
- See her while you can. You will not be disappointed. You don't know what other punters want. You don't know what service she will provide next time. This is not reviewing your punt, these are words of a pimp.
- She is so good she should raise her prices You do not know an escort's business model, you are a punter. Raising prices might not help her. Also, UKP represents the interests of punters and any statement that encourages price rises is counter to the principles of the board.
- Thanks Ms Escort, I had a great time. The review area is for you to provide factual guidance to other punters, not to send messages to escorts.
Example Reviews that were good or bad
- Here is the poor review First try. Here it is improved Good review
- Here is one that failed at first. But note the final result. Poor review that became good
I just want a template. Which reviews can I use?
These reviewers tend to use a template. Click on their name for more.
Also. Just read some of these. Do.
There is an easy picture posting feature as part of the 'post a new review page' now.
- Have the picture saved on your PC. (Toptip: consider deleting and emptying trash after posting).
- To post multiple pictures, just post the first. Then modify your own post and add more pictures.
Posting pictures using other picture hosting sites
This way does still work.
(A) Capturing pictures: If on a PC then the free method is pressing printscreen (PrtScrn) and then open Paint and paste (Ctrl+V). Then select the portion of the screen you want (e.g. the picture) and click crop. Then save the picture - the default format is .png but better select .jpg. There are other professional programs as well but this method is perfectly fine and free. On an Apple, this is cmd shift 3 (full screen) or cmd shift 4 (part screen). Saves to desk top.
(B) Uploading pics: Upload the captured image to an image hosting site e.g. imgur, imageshack, tinypic, postimage, etc. To upload a picture, just browse for it on your computer and click upload. Once the picture is uploaded a link is generated. It should be something like this http:/www.your_image_host.com/your_image.jpg. Most image hosts generate many links for different purposes (e.g. forum usage, reddit usage, direct link, thumbnail, etc). Although you can use the thumbnail or forum link better use the direct one and then do what is describe next.
(C) Posting pics in the review: If you want to just post an external link to that picture then just copy and paste the generated direct link in the review. If though you want to make it visible inside the review then use the following code:
The width is defining the width of the picture in number of pixels.
Examples of rating systems
Threads on this topic
- Thread on what to include in reviews
- Thread on how to capture pictures from AW
- Thread on use of euphemism and style in reviews
- Thread. Should I review a girl who already has many reviews?